Not Our Sammy
by Lunabell Marauder Knyte
Summary: Adopted! Past Sam/Harry. SLASH! YAOI! Male/Male. Don't know how else to say it. There's your warning! Dean never really knew what happened behind the closed doors of his brother's relationship.But he didnt really want to know, he supposed.But finding Harry after he disappears for so long, he can't ignore it anymore, especially with Harry almost dying.
1. Not Our Sammy

Title: Not Our Sammy

Genre: Romance and Angst

Rating: T (for swearing, mention of abuse, over using of alcohol and drugs, and violence)

Pairings: past-established Sam/Harry- Harry and Dean friendship.

Summary: Dean never really knew what happened behind the closed doors of his brothers and best friends relationship. He knew deep down that it wasn't the paradise it had been in the beginning when they were both shy and lovey-dovey. But he didn't really want to know he supposed. He wanted to believe that everything would be alright and that he'd have both family and friends. So he let everything slide. Even after coming back from hell. But after finding Harry again after him disappearing Dean can no longer ignore anything, and neither could Sam, he'd make sure of that.

Inspiration: Toxic Fools "The Little Things" and "Never You"

A/N: Really it was just some thing that entered my head after reading some really angst stories and whatnot. Hope you like.

* * *

The Impala's roaring engined died down as Dean pulled into one of the many motels that they're used to dwelling in for the night. Dean looked over Sam who had been silent the whole ride back from the woods.

It was the night of a full moon and they had just hunted down a werewolf. Even with the most experience hunters, something that has been done before, no matter how many times, never loses its dangers. Yes, they were used to the cold, the dark, and the paranoia. They knew what to expect and were as ready as a hunter could be. And to their Winchester credit it was all mostly simple. Shoot it down with silver, decapitate, and salt and burn it afterward for good measure. Watch out for the claws, but most importantly, never get bit.

In fear of the last threat Dean needed to push Sam out of the way before the big bad wolf took a bite out of him. Of course being that they had been on higher ground their descent wasn't so graceful. Tackling Sam out of the way, plus slamming into a tree to stop rolling down hill was not the highlight of Dean's night. Only good thing(for him anyway)was that Sammy was there to break his fall.

Once they were back on their feet, anger and pain now fueling them, the rest of the night was done in the most hunter professional ways and the werewolf was dead.

Dean and Sam got out of the car and headed to their room. Dean groaned as he removed his guns and jacket and pants. He was sure he'd have some bruises by morning. He heard the door to the bathroom close and he muttered, "Geeze, can't even let a guy call dibs anymore..."

Dean knew that Sam was depressed, hell! He was too. In another two months give or take, it'll be about half a year since Harry had left. It was a huge blow to both of them...hell it was a big blow to Bobby, Ben and Lisa too!

Harry had gotten to know all of them and had made their way into all of their hearts.

They had first met Harry a short while after the incident with Jessica, Sammy's deceased fiance, and a little before reuniting with their father. Harry had been in trouble with some demons. They wanted to recruit him but he wasn't going to join forces with the light of them. So Harry, like them, was a nomad. It was shortly after a somewhat nasty battle between them and the YED who had decided to pay them an unexpected visit that they learned what was so special about Harry.

He was _born_ with magic!

They were all skeptical at first, had wanted to hunt him down even, but then the YED had claimed that he wanted Harry because his magic was pure, and a helluva lot more powerful. Harry James Potter was a natural born wizard. He hadn't made any deals with any demon, didn't need to sacrifice babies, or kill anyone to get what he wanted done. He just spoke in Latin, waved his wand, and presto!

That had been Sam's initial attraction Dean thought. Sam was a geek when it came to understanding and knowing things. The supernatural was no different, but until now he stayed away from it as much as possible because it involved too much evil. But Harry wasn't evil. He was able to give Sam all types of supernatural information, show him spells and potions and charms, all without there having to make any deals, sacrifices, or anything. And Sam loved it...Sam loved Harry!

And Dean? Well, Dean had been very skeptical. His dad had always told him to never trust anything supernatural. That it would get you killed in the end. And most of the time he was right, but not about Harry.

Harry trusted Dean as much as Dean trusted Harry. The same thing was for Harry who had been warned about hunters before taking a trip across the pond. To the good Witches and Wizards, hunters, especially the Winchesters were like the boogeyman to them.

The mistrust last a while, but it all change one night Harry was ambushed by what Dean later learned were "Death Eaters", Dean saw the way Harry was hunter, saw the ounce of fear in his eyes that tried to sneak in there, only to be stomped on by something...something Dean himself was forced to develop at an early age. Dean isn't sure if it has a name. Its a mixture of heroism, bravery, determination...and yet that wasn't what it was. It was the tiredness in Harry's eyes, the same look he saw in his fathers eyes, that Dean's attitude change about Harry.

Harry was an outcast, like them, but even though Harry was younger than both him and Sam had the same tired eyes of his father. His obsessed with the hunt, ex-marine, war veteran father. Dean understood Harry's light sleeping habits, his paranoia that rivals theirs. Later Harry confided in Dean that all of his life he had been hunted...that it just never stopped.

The door to the bathroom opened to reveal a refreshed Sam, already redressed and ready to go.

"Where are you going?" Dean asked.

"The bar," Sam replied quietly.

"Wait up, I'll go with you," Dean said.

"No thanks Dean...I don't want any company," Sam answered.

Dean looked at Sam with a deep frown, "I don't think so Sammy."

"Its Sam, Dean. And I didn't ask for your permission. I don't feel like hearing anything from you right now," Sam said and without waiting for a response from his brother, left.

Dean's eyebrow twitched and his face showed his annoyance. Sighing, Dean headed for the shower himself. No use trying to go after Sam when he was like that.

As Dean washed himself, his mind wondered back to his previous thoughts.

After making a truce and starting to actually act civil towards one another they realized how much they had in common. They both loved Led Zeppelin, AC/DC, and Aerosmith. Plus they had the same eating habits.(When they first went to a diner Harry had been the first to order and his order was: a double bacon cheese burger with extra everything on it, a side of fries, a chocolate milkshake, and a piece of apple pie.) Though that was when they were out to eat. Once they were at Bobby's or visiting Lisa and Ben Harry would take over the kitchen and his cooking was _amazing_!

Sam and Harry then started acting weird around one another and after watching their attempts become _painful_ to **him**, Dean just told them to fuck and get it over with already! Dean wasn't really sure what exactly happened but the week that followed they were like a newlywed couple. Granted a weird one, I mean Sammy with his freakishly tall self, Harry being a wizard, and the supernatural that hunted them and the supernatural they hunted, they were very weird...plus other reasons, but they were a couple nonetheless.

Harry had met their father a few times. The first couple of times they had kept their relationship a secret, but later it was revealed. Their dad wasn't necessary pleased, well to everyone else he wasn't, but Harry...he's a special guy.

Maybe it was his spunk, maybe it was his own stubbornness that rivaled their dad's, maybe it was his hero like stupidity that he bumped heads with the Famous John Winchester, but somehow he had gained their fathers approval. _**That**_! Was a surprise and miracle all in it self.

Lisa had once told Dean that maybe their father approved of Harry because he was different but in a good way. Harry, unlike Lisa and Ben, was able to travel with them. Was able to fight and defend himself against what was out there. Harry knew worse things out there than the brothers did, Harry could act the normality that Sammy wanted, but still kept him in the line of the family business that their father wanted. Being with Harry meant that they both won and John was able keep both his sons and this time...this time without the hate.

Dean let the idea nest in his mind. He liked it. He liked it a lot. And for a while it was true.

Yeah they hunted, fought baddies, unburied graves, and all that nightmarish stuff, but on the side they were the most normal they had been in years. Harry and Dean would talk about music and cars and Harry's world and other stuff while the three of them were together, and while Sam had Harry all to himself they were like a regular couple. They did what they needed to do, but also had everything that they hadn't had before.

And Harry had given them that.

And then Dean went to hell.

After he had returned he noticed the changes immediately. Harry was thinner than he remembered, and boy was that kid scrawny to begin with. His skin seemed even more pale, and his eyes were surrounded with darkness. When he had returned and Harry hugged Dean...call it his older brother instincts, but it was something odd about that hug.

It was relief, which was understandable, but there was something more. With the relief came something more. A desperation, a need of protection, and the exhaustion... !

It really kicked Dean in the ass. Harry had been a war hero, a war warrior, a war veteran, and yet the vibes that he was getting from him where that of a frighten child that fear the monster in the dark and wanted nothing more but his big brother to make it go away.

Getting out of the shower, that line was engraved in Dean's mind...

"Make the monster go away..." Dean whispered.

Inside his mind Dean knew the name of the monster, his mind knew it, but his heart refused to say it.

Time passed and Dean noticed the change. Sam would spend more time with him hunting than with Harry. He would ignore Harry's calls and text's, would leave their place in the middle of the night to go to the bar and not return, maybe for hours, maybe for days. And as odd as it seemed to Dean, Sam was on full out denial that anything was wrong. Harry was his best friend and after not standing it anymore Dean wanted some answers, but what he got was his little brother who refused to admit anything remotely wrong. And guilt still after away at Dean because he had let things slide.

Even when he saw bruises on Harry that hadn't been there before and knowing that Harry hadn't been on a hunt, seeing how Harry would flinch and back away from people's touches, as if scared he'd be hurt, and how the fear he once saw because of Death Eaters that had been so miniscule that only a paranoid man like Dean could see, increase ten fold, and at the sight of ..._them._

But he ignored it all. Everyone did. It was betrayal in a sense. They all saw it happening, yet no one did anything. So one stopped it or tried to help. They all just turned their cheek to the other side. And finally Harry couldn't take it anymore and he left.

Sam had returned home and after a salt and burn, and tried to find Harry. They had been...on their best terms for the first time in a long time, and Sam thought that maybe they could spend the entire night making it up to one another. With a goofy smile on his face he had gone to search for his Wizard only to find the house empty. Frowning Sam settled himself in their old bed and waited for Harry to come back. Hours passed and Sam was becoming worried. When he finally wouldn't stand it anymore he decided to answer nature's call. And that's when he noticed it. Harry's things from the bathroom were missing. Blinking in surprise Sam walked into their bedroom and slowly, almost as if deactivating a bomb, opened their shared closet, only to find Harry's half empty. Fear settled into his stomach and like a madman he ran through the house in search of any trace of Harry...but there were none. To make it worse, Harry shared their lifestyle, their paranoia, everything. If he didn't want to be found...he wasn't going to be found. Even having Bobby look for him.

Back in Black went off and Dean picked up his cell. It was Lisa.

"Hey baby," Dean greeted softly. He was tired, and his mind was really depressing him, but he didn't want Lisa to worry.

"Dean," Lisa said in a voice that let him know something was wrong.

"What is it? Are you and Ben okay?" Dean asked immediately.

"We're fine Dean," Lisa reassured and Dean let out a breath of relief, but then asked, "What is it then?"

"Remember how you told me that sometimes there would be phone calls I would get hearing about _relatives_ with names... ?"

Dean did remember telling her that. After explaining a bit of their life to Lisa he had mentioned that they couldn't always use their real names so they used alias'.

"Yeah?"

"Well there was a call from a hospital calling about a Henry Black," Lisa all but whispered.

Lisa had befriended Harry and loved him right away. She felt a motherly need to protect him, and he was amazing with Ben. She knew a little something about Harry. Like his Godfather's last name being Black.

"Harry..." Dean whispered and confirmed Lisa's thoughts. "Where?"

Lisa had given Dean the directions to the hospital and had left a note to Sam explaining things. The Impala had only gone so fast a few other times, and most of the time it was life or death...Dean was glad it was the dead of night and near the middle of nowhere, it made it easier to get to Harry.

Even if Harry could hold his own Dean still worried that the wizard could have been dead.

Arriving at the hospital Dean used the name Lisa had told him to use. Going to the nurses station he asked for a Henry Black.

"Oh yes, the doctors would like to talk with you actually," the nurse said.

Frowning, Dean nodded. A graying doctor in his late years came up to Dean and smiled a reassuring smile, the kind that Dean has learned is the one given in an attempt to ease bad news.

"You must be Dean Black," the doctor said.

"Yes, Henry's cousin," Dean replied. They had similarishly close traits to pass that off.

"Well I was wondering if you could clear some things up for us," the doctor said.

"I can try," Dean said already thinking of every piece of information Harry has told him about himself.

"Thank you. Has Henry had any of the following illnesses? Chicken pox, measles, asthma, allergies, or any of the sort?" the doctor asked.

Dean thought back. They had mindless conversation to pass idle time and awkward silences.

"Well I know that Henry doesn't have asthma or any allergies. But I can't answer too much of his history. Our dad's were brothers and after a nasty fight, they never spoke again. Henry and I didn't know about one another until my uncle died and told Henry about us. We've only had a few years to get to know each other," Dean explained.

"Ah I see. Well...would you know if there was ever any substance abuse?" the doctor asked.

Dean frowned and answered immediately, "No. Henry isn't that kind of person."

The doctor sighed, "Mr. Black ,Henry was admitted here after being revived due to an overdose."

"Revived? He was dead? !" Dean exclaimed.

"For a moment. It was touch and go...the substance in his system is quite odd. Can't really be identified. And even after being here for almost a day now, still hasn't left his system at all. It's similar to heroin but not. And...that's not all," the doctor's face grew grimmer, if possible.

"What?" Dean asked though he wasn't sure he really wanted to know.

"I have to ask this because it somewhat obvious...what was Henry's sexual preference?" the doctor asked.

Not understanding exactly what that had to do with anything Dean answered cautiously, "Well...he played for the same team if that's what you mean."

Sighing again the doctor said, "I really can't say if I was fearing you were going to said that or not."

"Why?" Dean demanded.

"Henry was awake for some time after we restarted his heart," Dean cringe at that, "and...well, he seemed traumatized. Like in a panic state, hysterical almost. The way some patients who have claustrophobia get when they're in an enclosed space, and...well there was some very big hints in abuse. Upon further examination there were scars and wounds found all over his body...some of the psychologist from the psych ward came down here and they are prepared to diagnose rape as an issue as well."

"Stop..." Dean held out his hand, "Please...just stop."

The doctor nodded and gave Dean the time to get his bearings together.

"Is he okay _now_?" Dean asked.

"Well, like I've mentioned we're not sure exactly what this drug is, but its powerful. It's keeping him very obscure. He's also very violent when others touch him so we've been force to sedate him." Dean nodded in understanding, "But perhaps the face of someone familiar will help him regain some lucidity." the doctor offered with a warm smile. Dean tried to return it but failed. And the doctor sighed for what seemed like the umpteenth time in their conversation. "Though I have to be honest with you Mr. Black, in Henry's condition its not as simple as slapping on a band aid and letting it heal on its own.

"From the few moments of his lucidity your cousin seemed to have a severe case of PTSD. I've been around for a long time Mr. Black...if that is your real name. With what Mr. Potter has done in his past and whatever the hell happened to him recently...Well I'm not sure if full recovery is possible."

"How do you know who he is?" Dean asked.

"His scar made him famous...there's not another like it, or him. He's been fighting evil since he was one year old...no matter if that be the supernatural or natural kind," the doctor said.

"Do you know him? Personally I mean?" Dean asked.

"...My granddaughter, Hannah, went to school with him and married one of his friends. I've heard things about him. Though now a days its mainly rumor...To think of what that boy has been through." shaking his head the doctor said, "It was only a matter of time before he finally broke."

Running his hand through his hair and blinking back the forming tears and humorlessly asked, "That bad, huh?"

"Medically he's not supposed to be allowed out of here," the doctor began and then looked over his shoulder and dragged Dean into Harry's room. Looking to where the doctor had looked Dean looked and saw some suites, "Whenever there is any sign of anything like child, domestic, or anything to the degree that Mr. Potter is in the feds are forced into the situation to look into the matter."

Dean groaned in frustration.

"You will need to give a short statement. Just saying that _Henry_ disappeared without you knowing what happened. Add in the story about your _fathers_, and that you'll take care of _Henry_. It should be enough get them away for tonight. I'll discharge Mr. Potter later..."

"But you said he's not allowed out of here," Dean said.

"I said he's not _supposed_ to, but that substance he used isn't muggle drugs. If he stays and awakens enough they'll demand things he can't answer and I doubt he has the strength of apperating out of here, let alone take care of himself. I'll give you some medicine and some potions I have in stock, plus some instructions for you...Mr. Potter has done a great deal for our world...its about damn time we returned the favor."

Smiling a small smile Dean said, "Thank you...you knew to call us didn't you?"

Smiling a small smile of his own the doctor said, "His headmaster and I were once friends in school...and you know how all old people know one another..."

After giving his statement to the police, which was torture because somehow they kept on insisting Dean give more information. About an hour later Dean emphasized that part of _not_ knowing Henry until recent years and Henry _disappearing _about half the year ago, oh and that they were _**family**_!

Finally it was after two in the morning and the doctor helped Dean sneak Harry out into the Impala. Easier with the fact that something majorly wrong was just so happen to happen in the top floor. The doctor gave Dean his personal cell number in case any..._odd, _things happen that need unrecorded medical attention. Plus also a few numbers that were apparently some of Harry's friends who either didn't know he was alive or didn't know where he was and could do with some closure.

Making his way back to the hotel Dean's face furrows with irritation and gloom. Instead of going all the way back to his hotel room with Sam, Dean gets another place. He knew that eventually he had to go get Sam so he called Lisa and asked to come and help care for Harry. She answered at the second ring and told him that Ben and her where on the way.

In the mean time Dean made Harry as comfortable as possible on the rigidity old bed that squeaked under Harry's weight, though there wasn't much.

Dean pulled a chair next to the bed and just watched Harry. He sort of remembered doing this for Sam when he was younger and ill. Damn those times were easier. All he had to do was protect Sam...now shit is so complicated.

Another hour passed in silence, so many times did Dean have to check Harry's pulse to make sure he was alive, before Harry finally groaned and opened his eyes a bit.

Instantly panic was in them and he started to flail around and Dean tried his best to keep him calm without scaring him anymore. Once Harry saw Dean, he instinctively clung to him.

To his credit Harry didn't cry, he just...calmed down completely.

"Harry?" Dean asked tentatively as he got on the bed to make them more comfortable.

"Hm?" Harry replied.

"You okay?" Dean asked quietly as he stroked Harry's back in comforting motions.

"You're here, so I'm safe," was Harry's replied.

Smiling at how much Harry, his best and only friend, trusted him, Dean said, "Yeah...nothing's gonna hurt you. Still sleepy?"

"No...I'm tired, but not sleepy," Harry's voice was so quiet and small...it was odd.

"Think your up for some questions?" Dean asked.

"Do I have to?" Harry whined.

"Yes," Dean said in an authoritative voice but still gentle.

Sighing Harry said, "Fine..."

Dean didn't want to out ask about the bruises or addiction, so he went for something else, "Where have you been?"

"I retraced my steps from when I first got here," Harry replied laying back down on the bed. Dean went back to his chair.

"Where is that?"

"When I first got here I stayed in New York for a bit. I then moved west little by little. Indiana, Illinois, Missouri, Colorado, Nevada, California..." Harry murmured.

"What have you been doing?" Dean asked.

"At first...it was easy. Hunting was like second nature to me...I needed it because after everything...that's all I had. Nothing but war and blood and pain..." Harry said in a voice so empty of emotion...so vacant and tired...

"That's not everything you have Harry. You've got me, and Bobby, and Lisa and Ben...and Sammy," Dean whispered.

Harry gave a tired, humorless laugh, and said, "No Dean, I don't got Sammy."

"Course you do," Dean replied.

Harry shook his head violently, "That man who wears Sammy's clothes is _not_ **my** Sammy! My Sammy was never like _that_!"

"Like what, Har?" Dean asked.

"...I dunno..."Harry's British accent got really deep then, "He's just not the man I met. Not the Sammy who's eyes would sparkle when he was going to learn something new, the Sammy who blushed deeply and avoided eye contact when we talked about any type of sex, the Sammy who always looked troubled when we were doing something illegal for the sake of the hunt...Not the Sammy I loved."

"He's had a rough time Har..."Dean said lamely.

Harry's laugh then was maniacal, like a hyenas, "HA! Ben and Lisa had a tough time...I had a tough time...Sam...he...I don't know what the hell happened!"

"When did you start to do drugs Harry?" Dean asked strictly and bluntly.

Harry turned to look Dean right in the eye(Harries pupils were massive), and instead of seeing the guilt and shame Dean thought he'd see, he saw something else. He saw a smugness and a cold indifference he never wanted his best friend to have.

"It made things...easier!" Harry said in a simple happy obvious under the substance voice.

"Made what easier Harry?"

"The new Sam, duh," Harry replied as if was so obvious.

"What exactly happen between the two of you?" Dean asked. Dean never really knew what happened behind the closed doors of his brothers and best friends relationship. He knew deep down that it wasn't the paradise it had been in the beginning when they were both shy and lovey-dovey. But he didn't really want to know he supposed. He wanted to believe that everything would be alright and that he'd have both family and friends. So he let everything slide. Even after coming back from hell. But after finding Harry again, and in such a state, Dean can no longer ignore it all.

"After you left...he was depressed...that was understandable. You were his world...I...I was supposed to be the one to be there for him. To make him remember that he wasn't alone...that eventually the pain will subside...that we could make it out together...

"But no! No no no no no! It wasn't like that...No he had a demon bitch!" Harry swore and sat up only to fall back down again, "He cheated on me...repetitively with that bitch as he grew more and more addicted to her fucking blood! He had already been drinking...but it just got worse, Dean...

"After the first time we fought I ended up in the hospital...the nurse knew though. I could tell. The way she looked at me with pity...the way she glared at him...trying to get me to tell her the truth and trying to keep him out of my room...I guess she just sees it too much to know what it looks like..."

Longing, fear, desperation, and complete lost was in Harry's eyes as he grabbed Dean's arm and begged him to understand, "I didn't rat him out Dean, I swear! I said I got in a bar fight because I was gay...

"After that he didn't touch me for a long while...but he was just a cold and mean...I just...I just couldn't take it anymore...I went to my part of town...the shady part...and when I got back home...it was so empty...it reminded me that I had lost again...people left me...I remembered that I wasn't good enough so that was why Sam had walked out the door every night to be with that bitch...but...but...it made me forget about that...about Sam and hunting and...everything...it took me to memories...the better ones...I liked it..."

Dean's eyes were glassy with tears, and his cheeks were stained with them, "You OD'd Harry..."

"I know!" Harry exclaimed sounding happy about it, and had he not been so out of it Dean would have slapped him for it, "But I didn't die." Harry said sounding annoyed.

Dean groaned, "But that's a _good_ thing, Har."

"No its not!" Harry replied childishly, "If I had died he would have been to disgusted to be with me...he wouldn't have touched me..."Tears rolled down his eyes, not of sadness, but of pain, "I begged him to stop...I didn't want to...not when he was so pissed off drunk! I just grabbed the vile next to the bed and chugged it all down...it's only supposed to be a squirt for a few hours or not being lucid, but the whole thing...it was too much...and yet...not enough..."

More tears fell from Dean.

"Hey Dean?" Harry whispered.

"Yeah Har?" Dean whispered back.

"Am I a bad person?" Harry asked.

Choking back a sob, Dean replied, "Course not. You're a hero...and my best friend."

"Then...why?...Why am I alone? Why does everyone I want to trust betray and leave me? I must have done something bad Dean...the universe is punishing me for something..." it broke Dean to hear Harry speak like that...there weren't anymore tears. But his voice was hollow and void of all life. Then Harry have a short chuckle, "Heh, maybe God just really hates me..."

"NO!" Dean screamed.

Harry turned to look at Dean, his gaze foggy, as if he had been daydreaming and had forgotten Dean was there. Then he smiled, "You're right...you didn't leave me Dean...You even came back from Hell...You're a good friend, mate."

"You damn well better believe I am...And so are Lisa and Ben. They're gonna be here in a while to look after you while I go take care of something," Dean replied as he violently wiped away his tears.

"I like Lisa and Ben...you're lucky you have a good family Dean. And they love you...you wanted to hide from them, but you couldn't...and they didn't leave...they're always there waiting for you. Good or bad times..." Harry rambled.

"Yeah, they're awesome...and they're there for you too," Dean said.

"You think so?" Harry asked.

"I know so," Dean answered.

Harry yawned, "I think I actually am tired Dean...mind if I get a little sleep?"

"Not at all, buddy."

Harry smiled and closed his eyes. "Hey Dean?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think we'll ever find our Sammy? I miss him."

Looking at what was left of his best friend Dean frowned and replied, "I don't know Har...I've got no idea where our Sammy is."

Silence engulfed the room again. Dean back at his post watching over Harry, his over protectiveness on overdrive. Lisa and Ben arrived a few hours later. They were relieved to see Harry again. While Ben sat next to Harry and combed through his hair Dean explained everything to Lisa.

Then he was on the road again. It took about another hour for him to get back to his hotel room where Sam was. When he walked through the door he was ambushed by his little brother.

"Where is he? !" Sam demanded and grabbed Dean by his shoulders.

Forcibly removing Sam's hand from him, Dean asked, "Where's who?"

"Harry! You left a note saying you might have found him!" Sam exclaimed.

Dean silently cursed, having forgotten that. The older Winchester didn't reply but instead held a manila folder out to his brother.

"What's this?"

"The reason I've been gone all night," Dean replied.

Sam skimmed over the report but looked confused, "I don't understand."

"What's not to understand? Henry Black overdosed, he was covered in wounds, and, oh, this was just the cherry on top, has history of being raped!"

Sam looked silently at Dean and Dean whispered, "Read his description..."

Name: Henry Black

Eye Color: Green

Hair Color: Black

Gender: Male

As Sam skimmed over it once more something caught his eyes that made vile rise in his throat.

"_Lightning bolt scar on forehead."_

"Harry..."

"Yeah...Harry," Dean said.

Rage rose in Sam and he let out an animalistic roar, and then raged filled eyes zeroed in on his brother and demanded, "WHO DID THIS TO HIM!?"

"Who did this?" Dean repeated, then laughed a bit and shook his head, "Who did this, he says..."

Dean grabbed Sam and pulled him into the bathroom.

"You want to know who's responsible for Harry's condition? Well he's right there!"

Sam stared eyes wide into his own reflexion. Self disgust, guilt, shame, and dread entered him.

* * *

Yeah...hi. This is still me. Same author and everything, just moving all stories I plan to continue to this account. I will look this over and edit it later, but for now...please enjoy.


	2. Ben and Lisa, Harry

**Title:** Not Our Sammy

**Genre:** Friendship/Family

**Rating:** T

**Pairing: **Past-Sam/Harry(romance) Dean/Harry(friendship) Ben and Lisa/Harry(Family/Friendship)

**Chapter Name:** Ben and Lisa, Harry's Haven

**Summary: **After Dean called Lisa quickly got into her car, Ben hot on her heal, and they drove into the night. When they arrived and saw Harry looking so exhausted, hurt, and defenseless, it broke their hearts. To Ben, Harry was a great older brother and godfather figure. To Lisa, Harry was like her own son. She saw him just the way she saw Ben, and as a mother, the worse thing to happen in her life was something happening to her children. Taking Harry back to their home they determined to make it his haven...somewhere he can feel safe.

* * *

Lisa watched as Dean drove away, and then looked back at the bed where Ben was still stroking Harry's hair.

Ben looked up and asked, "How is he?"

Sighing, Lisa answered, "From what Dean told me, not so good."

"Are we taking him home?" Ben asked.

"Yes...but we'll wait until morning. Even though I'm too restless to sleep I don't like the idea of driving in the night...besides, Harry still needs rest," Lisa replied.

Ben nodded and there was a brief silence as both just watched Harry's chest rise and fall. Then Ben broke it by asking an inevitable accusation, "He did this to him, didn't he?"

Lisa's eyes didn't leave Harry as she replied in a whisper, "Yes Ben...he did."

There was no more conversation after that. Each of them deep in their own thoughts. Lisa didn't even bother trying to tell Ben to get some hours of sleep. Even though Ben lived a relatively normal life he was extremely careful with the people he let in. Lisa had allowed Dean to tell Ben of some of the things that were out there. Not enough to scare Ben from ever leaving the house, but enough for him to know how to stay safe.

Ben went to school like a regular kid, he was on the soccer team, was a very social boy...heck! He's even had a few dates here and there. But he can't really call anyone of those kids friends...not by the standards of his friendship with Harry. They were all merely schoolmates, acquaintances, but they were people he might lose touch with after they graduated.

_Friend_...it was a word that today is tossed around too easily, that it has lost its true meaning. Every person you meet is now your friend apparently. It's just like other words like 'love' and 'hate' and 'goodbye'.

They were all serious words and are used too commonly that they lose their initial meaning.

When you love someone that means that your every thought consist of their being. That being away from them brings you sadness and pain. When you see them smile and hear them laugh, it makes you happy for no reason...and when you're together, nothing else matters.

Saying goodbye means never seeing that person again. Other cultures use terms like "so long", "see you later", "until tomorrow", but never goodbye unless the person you are telling goodbye to is leaving and never coming back.

Words have power, but as generations pass, they lose their meaning...

Friend.

That word alone is left for the people who you can trust. They are the family that isn't related by blood. The ones that you automatically think of inviting when a special occasion pops up. The ones you worry about when something goes wrong in the world. The ones that give you refuge when you're family is suffocating you, the ones that know you enough to ask what's the matter and don't stop bothering you until they get the whole truth.

Harry was Ben's friend. It was so strong, their friendship, that it was almost like they were family.

To Lisa, like mentioned before, Harry was like a son. And being a mother changes everything. The world is suddenly more dangerous and scary. You're not scared of it, no, you've lived through almost everything, but you're scared for your children. You don't want your child to hurt, to cry, to know that the world isn't the happy place it could be.

When Harry first came into her home she was skeptical. No one who came from Dean's life was ever...normal. And that meant that he could be dangerous. As time passed though, danger, was the last word to describe Harry Potter.

He was polite and generous, witty and funny. He knew his place when it came to raising of Ben. Unlike Dean that tried to get Lisa to forgive whatever idiotic thing her son had done, Harry let her do what she needed to do, and he understood. Unlike Dean who saw it from Ben's point of view as her overreacting. Harry knew it was just a mothers worry. Whenever Ben did anything he wasn't supposed to, there was always a danger. And that danger could get out of hand, especially with what was out there, and she could have lost her son...her baby boy. Once the punishment was over, Harry would then go talk to Ben and explain it all to him, and since those times Ben and Lisa have little to no problems. There wasn't ever really any problems, but there are times when a parent and a child just don't see eye to eye. Thanks to Harry though, everything is nothing but smooth sailing.

Hours passed and soon daylight was breaking through the window of the shabby motel room. Lisa had gotten about an hour of sleep but was awaken by the light that entered her eyes. Blinking away the sleep she looked at the bed and saw Ben resting next to Harry. Ben was softly snoring, which made Lisa smile a little, but then it turned to a frown when she looked at Harry and saw him all but motionless. She placer two fingers at his neck and checked his pulse.

"Is he alright?" Ben asked.

"He's alive..." Lisa replied.

"Are we leaving?" Ben asked.

"I wanted to wait until Harry regained consciousness but I think it'll be better to get him home," Lisa said.

Nodding, Ben stood up and helped his mom get hold of Harry and move him into the car. Once he was safely place in the back seat, buckled in, Lisa placing the traveling pillow on Harry's neck so it wouldn't get sore, and Ben getting the medical bags Dean had gotten into the trunk of the car did they drive off.

The ride home was silent. It was a bit unnerving so half way through Ben turned on the radio. It might have been destiny or the universe or karma or whatever the hell you wanted to call it when _High Way To Hell_ started playing.

* * *

Harry opened his eyes and blinked until they focused. His head really bloody hurt! Small glimpses of the last few days flashed into Harry's mind.

He remembered going to the bar and getting drunk. He remembered walking home only to wake up the next day in the park. He remembered having a hunter come up to him and asked him, by his name, who he was. It was obvious that Bobby was still looking for him. Thinking of Bobby only made it inevitable to think of Sam, and when that happened...

His addiction started long ago. After coming to the USA but before Dean went to hell. His problem started behind Sam's back, it just so happened that Sam was added to the equation after Dean's death. Coming to America was Harry's only escape. The world that had once saved him from his personal hell in his aunt and uncles house had turned their back on him. Instead of being a hero he was now a threat. Though not everyone saw it like that. The ministry, some pure bloods, and other powerful people were the ones who suggested that Mr. Potter get some seals to block his power and be monitored more closely. Others who were grateful to what Harry had done, protested. Civil war would have broken out, and after fighting a war that encircled himself, Harry decided to fake his death.

Most believed it, others held hope that their hero was still out there.

The drug, _Memorial Bliss_, was first given to Harry by some American wizard. Its only supposed to be taken in small doses, but one dose was powerful enough to take you away for about half a day. It relaxes the muscles, sharpens and dulls the brain at the same time, and as the magic affect allows you to relive any memory as vivid and clear as the day it happened, no matter how new or old it was. And because it wasn't a muggle drug it had no after affect on the body...if taken in the right doses.

Harry would relive his moments as an infant. Where he saw his mother and father, and Sirius too, with him, happy...

He would relive the first time he met Hagrid and learned about who he really was. His memories of his friends, of the normal and peaceful times, of their laughs and triumphs.

Then he would wake up and be brought back from reality. When he first started it was because even his friends across the pond didn't know if he was truly dead or not. He hated not seeing them. Hated knowing he'd hurt them by leaving them. Hated knowing that they could be in danger and he'd have to leave them to fend for themselves. Hermione who had been like his sister. Ron, who was like his brother and best mate, Ginny...he loved her so much! And Teddy! His godson...

Thinking of Teddy brought back of everything that happened with Sirius. How his godfather's image was tainted by the ministry and was deemed a villain, imprisoned, and then forced to run. Never a free man. Enemy at one point, reunited for a short while only to be taken again by death!

It looked like history was repeating itself with him and Teddy.

"Harry?"

Harry looked up from his thoughts and saw Ben in the doorway. Looking around the room he realized that he wasn't in come cheap hotel room in the middle of the country.

"Ben?" Harry asked, his voice rough, unused, and throat dry.

Ben walked up to the counter and grabbed the glass of water and handed it to Harry. Taking a sip and refreshing his throat, when had been the last time he drank any liquid? Too long if he couldn't remember, and tried to speak again, "Where am I?"

"Home," Ben answered simply with a smile.

"How did I get here?" Harry asked as he sat up in the bed.

"Mom and I picked you up after Dean told us where you were," Ben replied.

"Dean?" Harry echoed. Now that you mentioned it Harry did remember Dean...not just a memory but more...real. It wasn't the first time that he had taken more than one dose of the drug, so he remembered that as it worked its way out of his system there would be moments of lucidity...the rest of the time was chaos.

One dose activates and enhances the part of the brain that holds the memories. Taking more than one dose, Harry had been warned, would activate and enhance other parts of the mind like the emotions and senses. So while under the influence Harry had been on extra alert, his thoughts more real, and sometimes his fear would be stronger than everything else. Last night, or yesterday or whenever, his thoughts and emotions were in a war within himself and his good memories lost. They brought out memories of the new Sam...and with the drug's power to increase the emotions behind the very clear memory...

But Dean had showed up and saved him. With Dean there, no one would dare hurt him. No his uncle, not Voldemort, not the Dementors, not even Sam. Dean was the only person on this side of the pond that was his friend without expecting anything in return. He liked Harry for Harry. And what's more, Harry was the one being protected in their relationship, not the one doing the protecting. That was Dean's job.

"You okay Harry?" Ben asked.

Shaking his head a little Harry replied, "Sorry...trying to remember everything from the last few days. I think I do remember Dean here and there. Where is he?"

Looking away for a bit Ben finally said, "He was on a hunt with Sam. Then we got a call from a hospital about a Henry Black. Dean went and got you..."

"Did...did S-" Harry started but Ben shook his head.

"No, Dean got you by himself."

Nodding they settled into a silence.

"Is it out of your system?" Ben asked.

"Yes. Sorry if I worried you. Taking a single dose only last about six hours at the most. I...might have taken more than that," Harry replied lamely.

"You shouldn't haven taken it in the first place!" Ben exclaimed and then went into a full rant to chide Harry, "You shouldn't have been out there alone! You should have come and lived here!...with us. Or at least called! It's almost been half a year since I last saw you Harry!"

Looking down in shame Harry whispered, "I'm sorry..."

"Damn right you should be sorry! I was _scared_ Harry! I know what's out there...and the thought that your hunting it? ! And _alone_! ?," Tears fell as Ben opened his heart to Harry.

"Mom and I are more careful with what we do and who we meet. I don't trust people as easily as I used to and I don't mind, and you know why?" Ben demanded and Harry shook his head, "Because the people I _do_ trust are _worth_ that trust! How do you think I feel when I don't know where you are or if your even _alive_! ?"

_Probably the same way my friends back in Britain_, Harry thought.

"I'm sorry Ben..." Harry repeated.

"Can I at least have an answer?" Ben asked.

It took some time for Harry to come up with an answer, and finally he said, "...You're right Ben. The people who obtain your trust are extremely special and you have to do your part...that's what any relationship is. Two sides of one whole...when Dean died I lost yet another friend," Ben nodded, knowing that when Harry used _friend_ he meant someone real important to him, "and long the way I lost another without physically losing him...I just couldn't trust him anymore...So I ran. It was a cowardly thing to do, but he made me doubt myself...and if I couldn't trust him or myself...I didn't think I could trust anyone." Harry's voice had become vacant all over again like when he had talked to Dean.

"...Its fine Harry. I forgive you," Ben said feeling guilty. He had lashed out on Harry because of his own selfishness. He had forgotten what Harry had gone through.

"You forgive too easily Ben...It could hurt you sometimes. Be sure you should forgive me before you do," Harry said.

"I know I forgive you. I was just mad because I missed you and I was worried about you. You're like like brother and...I don't want to lose you," Ben replied.

They stayed in another silence before the smell of food reached their noses and Harry's stomach growled loudly. If he couldn't remember when was the last time he drank something, food was even longer ago.

"Can you walk?" Ben asked.

Getting up and standing for a minute to make sure he doesn't stumble, Harry nods.

"Okay, come on then. Mom's making spaghetti and meatballs," Ben said and helped Harry down the stairs and into the kitchen where Lisa was busy cooking.

When she saw him she went over immediately and hugged him. Then she kissed his forehead and wiped away some stray tears.

"I'm so glad you're awake hun," Lisa told him.

"Thank you..." Harry whispered.

Sniffing and wiping her last tear she ushered him to a chair and said, "Dinner's almost ready. Anything else that you want?"

"No...this is fine," Harry answered.

"None of that. If there's anything you want or need I need to know Harry," Lisa ordered.

Looking down and looking sheepish Harry answered, "Chocolate."

"Chocolate?" Ben echoed.

Nodding, Harry said, "I don't know why, but whenever I was hurt, injured, or just feeling crappy I was always given chocolate. It's a magic thing I guess. Chocolate makes everything feel better..."

Laughing Lisa said, "It's not a magic thing sweetheart, its a human thing. I'll start on a chocolate cake right away. In the mean time, Ben, get Harry the M&M's from Dean's secret stash in the garage."

"Kay mom!" Ben said enthusiastically. Harry would get better, he'd make sure of it.

"Thanks Lisa...it means a lot. I don't know how long I'll stay here," Harry began.

"You'll be staying here until Dean and I see fit. No ifs, ands, or buts!" Lisa told Harry and made sure her voice left no room for arguing.

Nodding Harry said "Thank you," he thinks he'll he saying that a lot to them in the next few days.

Smiling Lisa hugged Harry again and told him, "You're safe here Harry...we're not going to let him, or anyone else hurt you ever again..."

* * *

TBC...


	3. Baby Steps

**Title:** Not Our Sammy

**Genre:** Family/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating: **T

**Pairing: **Past-Sam/Harry(romance) Dean/Harry(friendship) Ben and Lisa/Harry(Family/Friendship)

**Chapter Name: **Baby Steps

**Summary: **Harry has been living with Ben and Lisa for a while. They avoid anything and everything that deals with monsters, hunting, and a specific hunter that will remain unnamed. Harry seems completely normal, but its obvious that he just used to putting on a mask for everyone. The question isn't really if they can remove it, but can they handle what's under it?

* * *

"_What's your problem Peter? !" _Lois Griffin demanded on the episode of _Family Guy._

"_You wanna know what my problem is Lois? I. Care. Too. Much!" _Peter said as he grabbed Lois by her shoulders and shook her.

"_Peter, you're scaring me..." _Lois says.

"_GOOD! EMBRACE THE FEAR! DANCE WITH ME LOIS! DANCE THE DANCE OF LIFE!" _Dances into a china cabinet and crashes,_ "Uh...maybe you should go ahead and call that marriage councilor."_

Ben and Harry laugh as they watch the antics of the fat man on television. _Family Guy_ was by far one of the funniest thing to be on the air. The two ravens were sitting on the couch in the living room, a bowl of popcorn in-between them and a can of coke each.

"Ben, start getting ready for bed," Lisa's voice came in as she entered the living room and took the single seat.

"Awe...but mom, _Family Guy_ isn't over yet!" Ben whined.

"I don't care Ben. You've got school in the morning and it's already hard to get you to wake up. Now off to bed," Lisa said.

Huffing, Ben stood up and stretched. He gave Harry a hug and his mom a kiss before going up to his room.

"He's a great kid," Harry said.

"For only having a me to raise him, I think so," Lisa said with a chuckle.

Harry didn't laugh though but looked at her seriously, "I'm serious Lisa. Ben is a wonderful boy. You've done an incredible job as a mother...don't ever joke about it."

Smiling Lisa went to sit next to Harry and placed an arm around him, "Thanks Harry. It means a lot to hear that. People take parenting for granted, you know? Its just one of those things that's there."

"I know...like the sun, and water, and air...all very important, life required things," Harry replied with a playful smile of his own now.

"Right. So...you hungry? There are still some brownies left," Lisa offered.

Ever since his first night back, Lisa has been making chocolate goodies nonstop. The fridge is never bare of chocolate bars, M&M's(every two she buys for Harry, she buys one for Dean), chocolate syrup, and chocolate frosting. There are also oreos and chips ahoy.

"I'll take one please," Harry said. He may have chocolate at least once a day now...but he hasn't tired of it yet.

Getting some treats with some milk for both her and Harry, Lisa returns to the living room. After they got comfy Harry changed the channel and they played a movie instead. It was a comedy because Lisa didn't like anything to be depressing around Harry. He was finally going to have the nice and loving world he deserved to have since the beginning.

"Do you know when Dean'll be home?" Harry asked.

Harry would talk to Dean at least once a day, if not more. There was something in Harry that wanted, _needed_, to talk with Dean. Even though he loved Ben and Lisa with all his heart, his internal instincts needed to hear Dean's voice. Knowing that Dean was alive and would come to see him soon gave Harry's mind a great peace. Ben and Lisa were great, but they were civilian. If anyone came to hurt him they wouldn't be able to do anything. Not that he was putting them down or anything, it was just that Dean is an expert in making demons and monsters go away...no matter the face evil took on to fool him. Demons and monsters feared Dean...with him near, nothing would happen to Harry. Dean was just that kind of a person.

"Bobby needed some help but Dean should be home by tomorrow's lunch," Lisa replied.

When talking to Dean about how Harry's behavior was after waking up they decided to make things as normal as possible. Happier, but still normal. That meant Dean hunting. But it was strictly forbidden to speak one hunters specific name. So even though Harry knew that Dean was hunting with Sam, neither Lisa nor Dean would say his name. They always said, "Bobby needed help" or "friend" or something of the sort.

Lisa and Dean still worried because Harry seemed to have snapped back to normal after what had happened at the hospital. Before they would have let it slide because Harry was acting like he would usually, but now they knew better. They didn't know the exact details of Harry's life but they could imply enough to know it wasn't a happy childhood that Harry had. Plus knowing that Harry was some sort of war veteran, _and_ he hunted...Harry wasn't stable. And he was hiding he pain and hurt behind a mask. A mask that was placed there long ago. Perhaps even in early childhood. Even though it seemed pretty stuck on him, the last few trials he's gone through have caused the mask to break. Finally allowing them to remove it. No, _if_ they could remove the mask wasn't really a question. It was rather if they could _deal_ with what was _really_ under the mask, that was the real question.

"Oh," was all that Harry said.

They watched a good portion of the movie, the popcorn that was left now gone, without either of them saying a word. Though unlike most of his life that were full of constant awkward moments, the ones he had with Lisa weren't like that. They were nice.

"_If mum had been alive, I'm positive this is what it would feel like just being with her,"_ Harry thought and then said out loud, "I like the feeling."

"Like what feeling?" Lisa asked.

Crossing his arms and looking at his feet with a sheepish blush on his pale face Harry said, "When I'm around you...it makes me feel that...this is what it would be like if my mum was around...you know...nice."

Smiling at the younger raven, Lisa leaned over to hug him, "Thanks Harry. That's very sweet."

Returning the hug Harry had to ask, "Hey Lisa?"

"Yes Har?"

"If my mum..._was_ alive, do you think...she'd...you think she'd be happy? With...me?" Harry whispered.

Tears quickly wanted to form in Lisa's eyes but she fought them back. Harry needed strength, and he'd get it. "I'd bet my soul that your mother would be as happy and proud of you as I am of Ben. You're an amazing person Harry. You're kind and loyal and so brave..."

"You really think she'd think that? There would be nothing about me that...you know...would make her _not_ proud?" Harry asked looking down at the floor. Lisa knew he meant Sam, or maybe just him ever being with another male.

"If there was anything your mother would have a problem with Harry," Harry looked up at her waiting for harsh words, "Is when you're loyalty to your friends and the sake of good, cause you to put your life on the line and you somehow end up at Death's doorstep." Harry sucked in a breath of surprise and Lisa smiled kindly at him and cupped his cheek, "No mother in the world wants her child to suffer or have to face danger. If Ben, god forbid, ever took up hunting I would be pissed. I couldn't handle knowing he was out there...its bad enough you and Dean were out there..."

"Do...do you want to see my mum?" Harry asked quietly, as if he'd asked a stupid question. Like Lisa wouldn't want to see him mom.

"Of course Harry," Lisa whispered and caressed his face a bit.

Nodding Harry stood and raced upstairs, still being quiet as to not wake Ben, and returned shortly after. There was a book in his hands. Lisa saw upon closer inspection that it was an album.

"My friend Hagrid gave this to me when I was eleven," Harry said and handed the album to Lisa.

Taking it Lisa opened the album to the first page and looked in awe. The picture was moving!

"Our pictures move...they make the memory more real I suppose," Harry said.

Lisa nodded and smiled as she looked at the picture. It was like a home movie of just a moment. And in that moment everything was fine for Harry. He was a mere baby with nothing to worry about, both of his parents by his side taking care of all the troubles and dangers there may have been.

The woman, Harry's mother, who was holding baby Harry couldn't look happier as she held her son close and kissed him now and then. She had fiery red hair and mesmerizing emerald eyes. The man, Harry's father, looked proudly and lovingly at his wife and son and kissed baby Harry's little hand. He had jet black hair and glasses similar to the ones Lisa's used to seeing on Harry. And baby Harry himself looked content and joyful. Smiling at the camera and kissing his parents back.

"You look just like your father...but you," Lisa began.

"Have my mother's eyes. I know," Harry said proudly, "I've been told that a lot."

"They are beautiful Harry," Lisa said.

"Were...they're dead now, remember?" Harry said solemnly.

"But their love is still with you Harry. Never forget that," Lisa said.

Nodding Harry said, "I know that. It's actually because of my mothers love that I'm still alive."

"What do you mean?" Lisa asked.

"I..I've never told anyone about my past in Britain and I'm not ready to," Lisa nodded in understanding and squeezed his knee to let him know she understood, "But I will tell you that someone wanted to kill me as a baby," Lisa gasped, "My father, James, died trying to give my mum enough time to run with me. Though there was little she could go do to escape. The killer murdered my father and went after mum and me next. She begged him to leave me alone, when she died, she died protecting me. That activated a powerful protecting charm on me. As cheesy and cliché as it sounds, love is the most powerful thing out there. The love my mother had for me forbid evil to even _touch_ me! Whenever anything demonic want to touch me they would burn. They couldn't stand to touch me..."

Smiling kindly at Harry Lisa said, "That's wonderful Harry."

"It was. But it was broken when I turned fourteen. After that year, evil was allowed to touch me again," Harry whispered.

Lisa pulled Harry in for another hug. They stayed like that for a while. Both relishing in the fact that they were holding the other. That safety existed at the moment and it wasn't just some dream and, for Harry at least, wasn't in some alley passed out and dying.

"Want to see the rest? My friends are in here too," Harry said as he stood up. Lisa nodded and together looked through Harry's memories. Lisa was the first (human that is)to learn of the people who Harry had left behind. His friends Ron and Hermione, who together they made up the Golden Trio. Hagrid the half giant, Ron's redheaded family, Neville in his awkwardness, Luna with her weirdness. Sirius and Remus. The order members. Teddy. Dumbledore and everyone else that meant something to Harry were explained to an extent.

* * *

"Hey babe. How's everything?" Dean asked as he took of his shoes and landed on the bed of yet another motel room. He would have made the whole trip back but it was too long and he was too tired. Plus...Sam wouldn't leave Dean alone now. Almost funny how things changed.

Sam now followed him like a lost puppy wanting to be claimed by a master instead of Dean worrying Sam would run off and do something stupid and evil. Whenever Dean would talk to Harry Sam would get quieter than a mouse and look at Dean and his cell phone as if he were decrypting an ancient tablet or something that was mega important. And to Sam it probably _was_ like that. He hung to every word Dean would say and stretched his hearing as far as it would go in an attempt to hear Harry's voice, and Dean being Dean, unable to see his baby brother hurt as much as he was now didn't leave the room for some privacy. He just didn't mention to Harry that they could be being eavesdropped on.

"Better...I think," Lisa said. But she didn't sound worried, more like really honestly confused.

"Better meaning?" Dean asked and looked over his shoulder to see Sam sitting on the other bed without moving a muscle looking dead serious at him and his phone. It was almost pathetic.

"He...he showed me a picture of his parents and friends from Britain. Told me stories and other things. Times at Christmas and shenanigans he used to get into when he was little..." Lisa said happily.

"Really? !" Dean asked just as happy. That _had_ to be a good sign, right?

At hearing Dean's tone Sam's back straightened and he looked more alert. He bit his lip, and Dean knew Sam wanted to ask why Dean's tone changed.

"Anything else?" Dean asked.

"Not really. He did ask when you were coming home. Other than that we just had another day here," Lisa replied.

"Okay, well thanks babe. I'll catch some sleep and then head out in the morning. If I speed I'll be home for breakfast," Dean said.

"Don't push it Dean. It'd be nice to see you for lunch, and not wait until you get you of jail for after dinner dessert," Lisa chided and Dean chuckled. They said their goodbyes and Dean shut his cell off.

He turned and saw Sam look expectantly at him.

"Everything's fine Sam. Nothing to worry about," Dean said.

"Dean...I..." Sam licked his lips, "I need to see him."

"No," Dean answered immediately.

"Please Dean...it's killing me," Sam pleaded.

"No Sam," Dean said strictly. He even used 'Sam', not 'Sammy' to show how serious he was. Besides Harry had been right. That really wasn't their Sammy. Though their Sammy was showing more and more, but it's just a sick thought that this is what it took to bring their Sammy back. "It's too soon."

"It's been weeks!" Sam exclaimed.

"This shit doesn't disappear over night, Sam. Even though I love you and it hurts to see you hurt...Harry's far worse."

"When will I be able to see him then?" Sam demanded, anger rising.

"If you lose your temper as easily in front of me now, there is no way in hell that I'm letting you near Harry. He wanted to _die_, Sam!" Sam cringed at that and Dean whispered, "He's not ready."

"I miss him though..." Sam said miserably.

* * *

It was late afternoon when Dean arrived. Immediately Harry ran to hug him. He, Ben, and Dean then spent most of the day having a guys day out. A baseball game, pizza and ice cream afterward, and then home for TV and then dinner.

It was after dinner that Dean wanted to talk to Harry alone. They were on the front steps looking up at the night sky, just sitting in silence and drinking some soda. Ever since Harry returned, Dean doesn't drink in front of him. He's learned how much Harry hates drinking and didn't want it to bring back awful memories.

"How you holding up Har?" Dean asked.

"I'm fine Dean," harry reassured. "But why don't you tell me what's really on your mind?"

"What makes you say something like that Har?" Dean asked lamely. He knew Harry knew his mannerisms.

"Is it about Sam?" Harry asked.

Dean sighed, "Yeah Har, it's about him."

"Is he alright?" Harry asked, and Dean was shocked to hear that much concern in his voice. Had he not known better he would have believed the whole thing in the hospital never happened.

"For the most part. He's a wreck without you...and now he knows," Dean said Harry wince.

"How much?" Harry asked.

"The whole thing...I might have lashed out at him and ranted...sorry," Dean murmured.

"S'ok," Harry whispered.

"Kicked his ass though...made me feel a bit better. Not completely, but a bit," Dean said to lighten the mood.

"What's wrong then...if Sam's not in danger?" Harry asked.

Sighing again Dean said, "Sam wants to see you, but I forbid it."

"You..._forbade_ Sam from seeing me?" Harry asked shocked. Dean forbidding Sam from anything he wanted was almost rare, if it wasn't evil.

"Of course. It was his fault you ended up...where you did," Dean replied.

Harry shook his head, "It started before you went to hell. There were other things..."

"What other things?" Dean asked asked immediately and tried to scan Harry, as if just studying him will give him the answers he wanted.

Harry shut his eyes tight, "Not now...please?"

"Of course. When you're ready Har," Dean said reassuringly and squeezed Harry's shoulder for support.

"So...Sam?" Harry said.

"He wants to see you. He's desperate. I'm scared he'll do something stupid and that it might harm or scare you so I said no," Dean confessed.

There was silence before Harry said, "I can try." he'd do anything for Dean.

"No Harry, you don't have to," Dean said quickly.

Harry shook his head, "No Dean it's fine. I'm not one to be a coward. My House at school was known for our famous or rather, infamous bravery. I can't just ignore him either. If I do I can't move past this..."

"But you're still scared," Dean stated the obvious.

Harry took in a gulp of air, "We can...we can take it slow...baby steps."

"Baby steps?" Deana asked.

Harry nodded, "Yeah...start out small you know. Call him or something...not actual physical contact...or face to face..."

Letting it all sink in Dean nodded, "Okay...baby steps. And I'll supervise the whole thing. If I see that it's going south any type of way I'm gonna end it all. It's gonna be my call, Okay Har?"

All Harry could do was nod.

* * *

**A/N: **Since this was originally a one-shot I have to make this announcement. The whole time and events are..."odd" I know. The time in which Sam was on demon blood, John being alive, and Ben and Lisa being more known are all over the map. Originally that didn't matter because it was just a one shot.

That being stated I have decided that this story will have a lot of AU moments, so please excuse everything that may seem to appear or disappear all willy-nilly. As a fan fiction writer I quite enjoy distorting the laws of physics.


	4. Gone to Bobby's

**Title:** Not Our Sammy

**Genre:** Family/Friendship

**Rating:** T

**Pairing: **Past-Sam/Harry(romance) Dean/Harry(friendship) Ben and Lisa/Harry(Family/Friendship)

**Chapter Name: **Weekend At Bobby's

**Summary: **Dean is torn between his little brother who he has protected since forever and his best and only friend who has suffered more than anyone he knows. He wants everything to go back to normal, and Sam really wants to see Harry again, but Dean doesn't think he's ready. While working on a system that may work out Harry decides to leave the house for a weekend, and since Dean has become super protective of him, Harry doesn't have much of a choice as to where he goes. So, he's spending the weekend at Bobby's.

* * *

"Dean, I'll only be out for a few hours," Harry said, annoyance in his voice.

"No way Har," Dean said strictly without looking up from his newspaper.

"I haven't left the house in nearly a month Dean, a _month_!" Harry exclaimed.

"Don't exaggerate Harry. You've left the house plenty of times," Dean replied.

"Going to fetch the mail doesn't count as leaving the house," Harry countered.

"You've done more than get the mail Harry. You've taken Ben to school...gone shopping with Lisa...you've...uh...you've..." Dean coming to a blank.

"Exactly. Nothing. Dean, I'm bored, and I as much as I fancy Lisa's taste in décor I'm getting sick of seeing the same for walls 24/7. No offense Lisa," Harry said.

"None taken. He's right Dean. We can't keep Harry in the house like a caged animal," Lisa said.

"Thank you!" Harry exclaimed.

"We aren't treating him like a caged animal," Dean argued. "We're just keeping him safe. Complete difference."

"Dean, I get that you're worried about me. I also get that I've done things that don't rub you the right way at all, and those very same things are keeping you from trusting me from leaving the threshold, but come on! Can't I at least take Ben to the arcade or something?" Harry cried.

"No Harry, you can't. Do you know what can happen in that short time? I almost lost Sam when he was six because I went to an arcade for a few minutes of...'freedom'. Lesson learned. _No arcade_!" Dean declared slamming his paper on the counter.

"_Merlin_ Dean! Where the bloody hell can I go that can make you happy and get me the hell outta here? !" Harry demanded.

"...Bobby's," Dean replied.

"That's practically the same," Harry muttered as he crossed his arms.

"Well tough. I've got something I need to do and if you don't want to stay here then Bobby's the only other choice you've got," Dean said as he stared down the wizard.

"Fine..." Harry agreed.

"Great. I'll drive you there," Dean said as he stood up.

"No. You said you had things to do and Bobby's is still a drives off. I'll be fine Dean. I'll even call to tell him to expect me. If I'm not there in usual time, feel free to hunt me down. Lets be honest, when you set your mind and effort to it, there is nothing that can hide from you. I'm no exception," Harry said.

Dean's lips thinned out into a fine line as he thought it over. He knew he was being a bit unreasonable. He knew himself what if felt like to be trapped and didn't like it. Being practically raised on the road, being inside for too long was really claustrophobic like. Besides...Harry wouldn't leave. He couldn't. He _needed_ Dean. He needed to hear his voice at least once a day and visual contact weekly.

"Fine. But you aren't taking that bike of yours all the way out there," Dean sighed.

"Then what am I supposed to take?" Harry demanded.

"...Take the Impala," Dean said simply.

There was quiet all around the room. Three pairs of wide eyes locked on to Dean who was drinking his coffee. Feeling so many eyes on him Dean looked up and asked, "What?"

"You're...willing to let me..._borrow _the Impala!?" Harry asked shocked.

"Well...yeah. I've got my truck in the garage. Plus, my baby was built for the road. If anything happens, though it better not, my baby will keep you safe. Not only is she one hundred percent beauty but also one hundred percent muscle." Dean replied with a shrug.

"Um...okay then. I'll call Bobby and...Uh...head out...in the Impala..." Harry said as he got out of the chair slowly and got out of the room.

Ben and Lisa were still staring at him and he turned to look at them as he retook his mug of coffee in one hand and his paper in the other. Dean stared at them a bit longer and asked, "What?"

"Nothing," they both said in unison and left the kitchen as well.

Dean watched them all go before shaking his head and muttering, "I'm surrounded by weirdos."

* * *

Harry arrived at Bobby's Salvage Yard after a while. Shutting off the engine roar of the Impala, Harry went up to the door and knocked. Bobby opened the door with his infamous scowl of his when any of them do something idiotic, which Harry supposed he has done. Harry gave a nervous smile as he took the flask from Bobby and gave it back after taking a gulp of it down.

Stepping passed Bobby to enter the house Harry stood there for a moment, feeling very awkward.

"You gonna stand there all day like a idjit, boy?" Bobby gruffed out.

"S-suppose not...j-just, you know...w-waiting for it," Harry stuttered. For some reason Harry was nervous. Not in the scared kind of way. But more in the sense of that when a child disappoints their parent by doing something completely foolish.

"Waiting for what? Hearing me tell you what you already know? That you're a complete idjit for what you did and how _stupid_ you were for not knowing how to pick up a damn phone to tell us you were even _alive_? I mean I know you were raised with minimal technology but I didn't think a phone was too advance'd for ya that you couldn't get to one!"

"I'm sorry sir," Harry muttered. Bobby reminded Harry of Remus at times. With the strictness and lectures. Even though he thought of Sirius as a father figure, Sirius was more of the fun dad, rather than the strict one. Bobby was the one that pointed out his flaws, but unlike his uncle, it was so Harry could learn from them, not to humiliate him. And because of that Harry felt ashamed for worrying the older hunter.

Before he could apologize again he was brought into a tight embrace. After pulling away Bobby glared at him and pointed a finger at his chest, "You ever do anythin' stupid like that again and I swear not even Merlin himself can save you from my wrath, boy."

"Yessir!" Harry bit his quivering lip to stop the tears. Feeling the love from different type of people, people who knew what real love was, what it _really_ meant, who have actually lost it, and therefore _know_ to treasure it, love him...it was amazing.

"Now...Dean called after you did. Explicit orders to not let you leave the house unchaperoned," Harry groaned, "But so long as you're back two hours before sundown no one's the wiser. You understand boy?"

Nodding, Harry exited the house again and climbed back into the Impala and headed into the town. First to get some food. Lisa's cooking was great, but Merlin did he need a double bacon cheese burger! After that he'd catch a movie at the cinema or something.

* * *

Dean drove up in his white truck to the temporary apartment Sam had been renting the last couple of weeks. Sam didn't want to be any farther from Harry than needed, and this was as close as Dean would allow. As he walked up to the door, Dean didn't even need to knock seeing as Sam had the door already open.

"Where's the Impala?" Sam asked as he walked into the kitchen behind Dean.

Taking out to beers and handing on to Sam, Dean said, "Harry has it."

"You let Harry drive? Dean how could you! ? He could drive off! He could crash! He could...he could..." Sam ranted in anger.

"He's on his way to Bobby's. He's been cooped up inside for weeks. He's getting restless, so I let him take a breather. Sides...I needed to talk to you and this way we know that he's safe with Bobby," Dean shrugged and took a sip of his beer.

Either Sam was too distracted himself by the news of Harry being far away again to not notice Dean's own tenseness, or Dean really was as convincing as he believed.

"He still needs to be supervised Dean! He OD'd for gods sake!" Sam cried.

"I _know_ that Sam. But he couldn't be here anymore. If I didn't let him go on his own then he'd just up and leave on to who knows where with no intention on coming back any time soon," Dean said.

"Do you really think Bobby's not gonna let him leave the house?" Sam asked, finally mimicking his brother and taking a seat in one of the chairs.

"Of course I don't. But the thing here is trust, Sam. Harry has to trust me to let him go on his own, and I have to trust him to come back to me," Dean said simply.

"Back to you..." Sam whispered. "He always goes back to you doesn't he?" Sam abruptly stood up and caused the chair behind him to fall.

"Sam..." Dean tried to place a hand on Sam's shoulder but Sam furiously shoved his hand away.

"I get it! Okay? I get it! I messed up! I was a complete asshole and ruined everything I had with Harry! I...I ruined my chance at happiness...again...and now _you're_ the one he trust most. _You're_ the one Harry screams for when he's in danger or scared. Now _you're_ Harry's world..." Sam said miserably.

Dean sighed and rubbed his eyes, beers long forgotten. "Sam...Okay, yes you've never messed up this big before. That's the understatement of the year. But now that case is closed. All the clues have been found, charges have been pressed, and the verdict has been delivered."

"Yeah...and now I'm serving my life sentence without Harry," Sam muttered as he leaned miserably against the counter with his arms crossed.

"That was not the point I was trying to make Sam," Dean said.

"Then what the hell is your point Dean?" Sam demanded.

"I want things to go back to normal Sam, but for god's sake this isn't just some 'I forgot our anniversary once' thing! Or flirting with someone else! You _cheated_ on Harry with a **_demon_**! _And_ you abused him! And even though he's traumatized, even though he's already faced so much freaking shit in his life that we don't even _know_ _about,_ and yet _somehow_ he's keeping himself together! I want to help you fix the shitty situation _you_ got yourself into Sam, because that's what **_I_** do! But I can only do that if you let me! Now are you gonna let me help you or not!?" Dean roared.

Sam was quiet for a while before he whispered, "I'm sorry Dean. I just...I miss him. I want to say sorry so bad...I...I just want to hold him and tell him that I love him until either I can't talk anymore or I've said it enough time to cover all the times I didn't say it before. I want to make it up to him for every wrong touch I've made him go through...but I just miss him...his voice...he doesn't have to love me back Dean...He...he just has to tell me that he's okay...if he does the nightmares will go away...I know they will..."

Dean sighed, "It's not going to be easy Sam. What you've done...it's not something that disappears right away. It's not something that's easily forgiven..."

Dean heard a muffled sob and saw Sam turn away from him, but heard a soft, "I know..."

"Okay...then...I have no idea how we got this visit started to negatively. I had actually come with good news," Dean said, finally remembering his beer, but thinking of Harry, Dean just puts it off to the side. Alcohol doesn't do what it used to for him.

"Really?" Sam asked as he returned to his seat after picking up his seat.

"Yeah. I talked to Harry and he's agreed to try to fix...this," Dean used his index finger point between Sam and the air.

"Really! ?" Sam asked excitedly.

"Yeah...but Sam?" Dean asked.

"Yeah?" Sam asked with a smile of his face, truly happy for a moment after almost over half a year of being miserable.

"Baby steps...like I've said. Shit like this don't disappear over night. We have to think about Harry in this okay. He's agreed to let me be in charge of this whole thing. If I'm not in charge of what goes on then this whole thing is off, understood?" Dean asked.

"Yeah yeah...so, uh...when can I see him?" Sam asked.

"Not yet Sam. Still too soon. Harry's barely being...normal and getting comfortable with things," Dean said.

"So what's baby step one?" Sam asked impatiently.

"One minute phone call. You'll call my cell, if Harry want to answer, he will. You'll be on speaker with me supervising the whole thing. You'll have exactly 60 seconds so make sure your first words get the point across without being overbearing. It's only step one after all," Dean explained the rules of his conditions.

"One minute!?" Sam exclaimed, "That's not enough Dean!"

Dean didn't seemed phased at all by his brother's upcoming anger. And simply replied with, "Sam, when you want to get over a phobia you don't just run at it like a mad man. You work your way up to it. Use this example. Being afraid of drowning. I wouldn't send Harry to a scuba diving trip on the first try. That'd be asking for an episode of crazy none of us are ready for. We would start with...a puddle."

"It's only 60 seconds...and he may not pick up at all. Or he might not answer me or say anything," Sam said miserably.

"I know that Sam. But we have to start somewhere. You just call and if he answers...just say hello. You know, basics," Dean said.

Sam was quiet for a long minute before he let out a breath through his nose and nodded stiffly. "Alright Dean...anything to fix this between me and Harry."

* * *

Harry was driving back from Bobby's house and was about half an hour away from Lisa's. Before leaving the wide empty road he had come so familiar with, Harry parked the Impala on the side of the dirt road and got out. Closing the door Harry leaned against the black car and looked up at the sky.

He wasn't good at astrology but he liked gazing at the stars. They made him think of Sirius. How he wanted to be free and how they had planned to buy a house out in the country where there would be millions of stars.

He had talked to Sam about it once, still wanting to have what he and his godfather talked about. But that dream, among others went ignored and forgotten. His cell phone rang and Harry looked at it and saw that it was Dean calling. He looked at the screen until it went off only for it to start up again. Sighing, Harry threw the phone into the car and went back to looking at the stars.

"He gets annoyed when you don't answer the device."

Harry didn't jump nor was he really surprised to see the angel next to him with the signature trench coat that could only belong to Cas.

"I know," was Harry's answer.

Neither of them said anything and just stood there for another ten minutes before Harry got into the Impala and headed to Lisa's again.

Parking in the drive way, Harry got out of the car and was about to head inside. The famous rumble of the Impala alerted the residents inside that Harry had arrived. Dean was out of the house in seconds. He looked at Harry, first relived, then annoyance, and as he tried to get closer to him, panic. Because as Dean got closer Harry stepped back. Eyes a bit wider than usual and some fear in them. Dean was about to call out to him but before he got the chance there was a loud 'crack' noise.

"HARRY!" Dean yelled.

Nothing but silence answered his cries.


	5. Invisible in Plain Sight

**Title**: Not Our Sammy

**Genre**: Suspense/Drama

**Rating**: T

**Pairing**: Viktor/Harry(Friendship... /?)

**Summary**: On his way back from Bobby's Harry gets a strong attack of nostalgia, and it quickly turns into a panic attack. What the hell did he get himself into? What the hell happened to him? Even as he looked at Dean Harry couldn't help his actions. He was trapped, and he would continued to be trapped unless...he ran. Like he had done before when he ran for the sake of the war...this time though, he ran for the sake of his sanity.

**Chapter Name:** Invisible In Plain Sight

* * *

After apparating, Harry stumbled a bit. He had gotten used to the feeling, but with the emotions that he was feeling before hand...well let him just state that all the three D's weren't there. He was determined to get away, but he really didn't have a destination in mind, nor did he think he had any deliberation either.

He had no idea what the hell came over him. He had been fine leaving Bobby's place. Great even. He was glad to have seen the man again and to know that he had a true friend there...

Maybe that was the problem. Maybe he was making friends that meant the same as...as his mates back in Britain.

Harry had left abruptly, without notice, no note, no explanation, and hasn't made contact since. He hadn't meant to do that, it was just that with what the ministry was planning on doing with him, Harry just thought it'd be better to drop off the grid. For the sake of the wizarding world that was barely rebuilding itself after what Voldemort had done, and just like he had done in the war, for the sake of his love ones, he had disappeared.

They all probably thought that he was dead after years of no communication at all...well, he was sure almost all of them did.

Ron and Hermione though...

They grew up with him. They knew what he was capable of and they knew what went on in his own mind better than himself. He was willing to bet all of the money that he had in Gringots that they still believed...no, they _knew_, he was still out there.

And now more than ever, he was tempted to go to them.

But he couldn't. There was something going on. It could be just his paranoia, but after years of being chased and attacked, Harry's learned to trust his instincts. And right now they are warning him that there was a storm in the horizon. What it would bring, Harry didn't know. Another reason he wanted to get away from his friends was because he got this odd feeling...like it wasn't over. _What_ exactly, again Harry wasn't sure.

It seemed personal somehow.

"Harry Potter?"

Harry's head shot up and his eyes opened wide with panic. He had apperated into an alley and then began to walk. Not paying attention to where he was going. People just kept passing him by. Where the hell was he? And who had called him?

Looking up as a tall and strongly built figure approached him, Harry gasped in shock, "Viktor?"

Viktor frowned at the English wizard and then grabbed his arm, tight enough to actually drag Harry, but not so much that it would leave any mark later. They walked a few blocks in silence before they arrived at an empty park.

"Vat are you doing here Harry?" Viktor asked.

"I...I dunno," Harry replied, still a bit shocked to see a familiar, yet not, face.

"Are you alright?" Viktor asked.

"Yes...no...I dunno. I just apperated and to be honest I don't know where I am," Harry whispered.

"You are in muggle London," Viktor informed him, his accent still very present.

"Muggle London?" Harry repeated and then asked, "What are _you_ doing in muggle London?"

"I liff here now Harry," Viktor said as they found a bench once they were deep enough into the park.

"You live...in muggle London?" Harry asked as he looked at the Bulgarian wizard.

"It is a bit odd, is it not?" Viktor asked. Harry nodded but waited for an explanation. Seeing Harry's face Viktor said, "I retired but not a lot of people vere happy vith that. They expected me to continue to play but I just could not any longer."

"Why not? You were brilliant!" Harry exclaimed.

Viktor chuckled, which caused Harry to blush, he was acting like a fan and being a somewhat celebrity himself, he knew how annoying that could be. "Sorry," Harry whispered.

"No no, it's alright. Even though I luff'd Quidditch, it vas getting harder for me. After the tournament I vas still out of it for avhile, and ven I got back to da game it vasn't the same. I got injured a few times and falling from such heights is not pleasant," Viktor explained and Harry nodded in understanding. He knew how terrifying it was to fall from his broom, and Viktor being a pro, it was much much higher.

"You may understand considering you yourself vere a player, but others do not. They see me as immortal. As if I vill not brake. Vell, after a nasty fall and hurting my back, I decided it vas time for me to retire. I vas over thirty anyvay, so vhy not?" Viktor said with a shrug of his shoulders.

"I'm guessing not a lot of fans were pleased?" Harry asked.

Viktor shook his head, "No. Vhich is vhy I now live in muggle London. During the visit to your school, I very much enjoyed your land. I vould have stayed in the vizard part but too many people vould recognize me. This vay I can valk the streets vithout vorrying about being seen and bothered."

Harry nodded again in understanding. Then Viktor took a minute to look at Harry very closely. Harry felt something like being under a microscope.

"Vhere have you been? Last I have heard...you vere dead. I did not believe it, but that vas vhat vas being said," Viktor told him.

"That's because...I faked my death," Harry replied.

Viktor nodded. Harry didn't say anything and neither did Viktor.

"Vould you like to talk about it?" Viktor said.

"I don't want to be out in the open any longer. If I really am back in London..." Harry said and Viktor nodded.

"Ve can go to my flat. No von is there," Viktor said and they walked to Viktor's apartment. Harry pulling up his hood, even though they were in the muggle part of London, he didn't want to risk it. Once inside Viktor offered Harry something to drink.

Harry asked for some tea.

After magically summoning some glasses and waiting for the tea to brew, which made Harry feel nostalgic about being around another wizard he knew after years of practically being alone, they stayed quiet.

When he was about half way done with his tea, Harry put it down and looked like he wanted to say something but just couldn't find the right words.

"Da ministry was being unreasonable, yes?" Viktor asked.

"How did you know?" Harry asked.

"I may not have been in such as position such as yourself, but I do know about politics. You vould be surprised at how much professional Quidditch involves politics," Viktor said.

Harry nodded and suddenly it was like a dam broke and Harry spilled everything, "After the war with Voldemort things were surreal. I just couldn't believe that it was over. I spent most of my life fighting an evil that chose me as his one true enemy. Not to mention that the people I had come to know and love...some of them were dead, and others weren't the same...nothing was the same anymore. But after the rush of it all finally went away and we all realized that it was finally over...we thought we could have settled down now. Do the normal thing for once. Me and my friends would become aurors, me and Ron would probably work in the field, Hermione, well she could have worked on the field or in the office and, hell, maybe work her way up to minister herself! The point is...it was getting better, normal.

"But then the ministry started making 'surprise visits', checking my wand for magic activity, and having private healers looking into my magical core...it was unnerving. They also never told us why they were doing it to me, and only me.

"Finally, not standing it anymore, I decided to take matters into my own hands. I did some sneaking around and asked a few people who knew things that other people didn't normally know. After the war, finding that sort of information was easy..." Harry said with a dry chuckle.

"Vhat did you learn?" Viktor asked with a raised brow, completely serious, interested, and sincere.

"The ministry was keeping a close eye on me and my magical activity," Harry answered.

"Vhy?" Viktor asked but already had a hunch.

Harry gave another humorless laugh and replied, "It wasn't the first time I heard this. After I first saw Voldemort rise in the tournament, people had been in complete denial and started to bash me with saying things like 'there could only be one dark wizard' and other bullock like that. Actually," Harry put on a thoughtful face, "This was all started in my second year. See, when Voldemort first attacked me when I was one year old, some of his powers were transferred to me, and so was the ability to speak to snakes. That caused me hell during my second year. They were all saying things like the only reason I defeated the son of a bitch was because I didn't want another dark wizard on my turf. People thought...think, I want to be the next dark wizard..."

"But you are not. You are da reason most of those vizards can now sleep soundly at night. How dare they think such stupidities? !" Viktor cried.

Harry shrugged, "I dunno. But it got highly annoying after a point that I just couldn't take it anymore. It was too soon after losing some of my closest friends, after the place I practically considered home was used as a battle ground, and...my purpose in life now being gone...the harassment I got from them was too much."

"Vhich is vhen you decided to fake your death?" Viktor guessed.

"Yes..." Harry replied.

They sat in another silence after that. Harry allowing Viktor to sink it all in and he himself let it sink in as well. Over the years he's never actually said it out loud. It was always this shadow in the back of his mind that he tried to keep behind bars. It was always too painful because he knew that his actions had been permanent. He couldn't change what he had done and it pained him to think that he could never see his friends again. It'd be too big a risk, but damn if he wasn't tempted. Especially right now. Sitting before Viktor brought back memories of his fourth year, what he had to overcome, what he saw, and then also Bill's wedding...both events when he had met with the Bulgarian Wizard that were both magical events, but also life changing.

"They never believed you vere dead, you know. Not even now I think," Viktor said quietly.

"Who?" Harry asked.

"Who else, Harry? Herm-own-ninny, and Veasely, and everyone else. They do not belief you are dead," Viktor said.

Harry shook his head, "I made sure it looked like I was dead. I even left a body behind and everything."

"They are your friends Harry. They know vhat you are capable of. They are hurt veru much of not being able to see you, but after surviving your greatest enemy...they do not belief you vould surrender...it is not your vay," Viktor said.

"How do you know what they think Viktor?" Harry asked as he picked up his tea again.

"I visit the Veasley household regularly. Fleur and I are still good friends. As well is Herm-own-ninny, and her family. Ronnald has finally stopped glaring at me vith such hate now that him and Herm-own-ninny are married vith beautiful children. They talk about you very fondly and they miss you. They vish you vould return..." Viktor said.

Tears couldn't hold back at hearing everything from Viktor's lips. "I miss them too Viktor...Merlin, I miss them all so much...but I'm not ready to return...I...god I need them, but...I can't Viktor I can't!"

Pure instinct told Viktor to go and hug the younger wizard, and hold him tight. Harry didn't argue or struggle, he just gave in and hugged Viktor tight. He needed the support. Dean had been great, but there was something missing, maybe he needed a fellow Wizard to feel like he was truly safe...like he truly belonged somewhere. Dean did his best, but even Dean was a pariah amongst humans. Viktor was human, and a wizard. He had been a celebrity of sorts and focus of the media who didn't care for his personal space, something they both understood.

Viktor was a link to the world he was all but forced to leave, without being a direct bridge to his old life. For now, Viktor will be the seams that will keep him from falling apart...for now.

* * *

Sam drove like a madman towards Lisa's house after getting a phone call from a somewhat freaked out Dean. When he arrived there he saw Dean's truck in the front and the Impala in the drive way with his older brother leaning against the drivers seat, arms crossed, and scowl placed firmly on his face.

"Dean?" Sam asked as he approached hi brother.

Dean looked up to meet Sam's gaze and said, "Sam..."

"What's wrong?" Sam asked though if he had to guess, it had something to do with Harry...god he hoped it wasn't.

"He's gone, Sam," Dean said.

"Who?" it was a stupid question, Sam knew that, but he still asked.

"Harry...he apperated when he got home...I have no idea where he is," Dean replied.

Sam's legs decided that because of the news they couldn't support him anymore and he had to use the Impala to keep standing. His chest clench in pain and worry. If Harry was as unstable as he was guilty, then Harry was in trouble. He could be anywhere in the world! If he was still in the US then he could run into anything supernatural and be servilely hurt. Or he could be anywhere around the world and face creatures that neither he or Dean have ever encountered...

"Get a hold of yourself Sam," Dean said as he helped his brother steady himself.

"But Dean...he's gone. He's teleported himself to who knows where!" Sam exclaimed.

Dean didn't say anything for a long while that Sam had to look at him to make sure he was still there, "Dean?"

"You're right...Harry has the power to go anywhere around the world he wants...he could be anywhere..." Dean was murmuring to himself. But it was the kind of murmuring that let Sam know that he was planning something.

"Dean?"

"Fire with fire..." Dean whispered so low Sam almost didn't hear him.

"What?"

"Sam!" Dean grabbed Sam by his shoulders, "All we need to do is fight fire with fire!"

"How are we supposed to do that, Dean?" Sam demanded.

Dean let go of Sam's shoulders and yelled to the sky, "CAS!"

The brothers waited, then there was a gust of wind and the sound of a coat flapping in the wind. They turned around as stared at the normal stoic face of Castiel.

"Sam. Dean." the angel of the lord addressed the Winchesters.

"Cas, we need your help!" Dean said.

"Is it about Harry?" Castiel asked.

"Yeah, we need to find him. He's apperated," Sam said and gained a glare from Castiel.

"I am not surprised after what happened," Castiel answered quite rudely towards Sam.

"Cas...not now. Can you find him?" Dean asked.

Castiel looked at Dean and sighed, "Unlike you two, I am capable of locating Harry's magical core if I look hard enough..."

"Great! We need you to take us to him...or at least me," Dean said.

Sam looked over with a look of betrayal and hurt in his eyes, but he blinked them away.

"I can not do that Dean." Castiel said calmly.

"Cas! Harry is out there and he is _not_ okay. He needs to be supervised and tended to...if not...he could..." Dean left that sentence hanging.

"I understand why you are worried Dean. However I cannot take you to him at the moment. He...he needs this moment that he is having," Castiel said.

"What moment?" Sam asked.

"Harry _is_ healing. It's an extensive process, but it is happening. There are several stages and this is one of them," Castiel explained.

"So Harry is gonna be alright?" Dean asked with hope deep in his voice.

Castiel glared one more time at Sam and then soften his gaze at Dean and said, "Eventually. But there is something that I must do in order for his healing to continue at the rate is has been, if not faster."

"What's that?" Dean asked.

"I must show you two what Harry has been through...what he's over come...and what he's left behind..."

* * *

It was so easy to write Castiel's dislike for Sam. I didn't think it was too off from the time that Sam was soulless in the series.

That being said...I apologize if there appears to be no direct time line...there really isn't I think. I've been trying to put a direct place but...I don't really know. I mean it can be season 6, except that its a bit AU. So...yeah, because you all know like in the episode 6X6 "You can't handle the truth" Dean still talked to Lisa even while being on the road with Sam...and then the whole thing in 6X21 "Let it Bleed" epic...uh, sorry lost my train of thought, so yeah, no real time line, so sorry if that bothers you.


End file.
